Broadcasting from the Capital of the Free World, ZardCast is a weekly podcast revolving around the Washington Wizards. Host CT Schwink and a rotating cast of characters break down the week that was in Wizards basketball, dissecting games, hitting on the big stories, as well as unsuccessfully predicting the future. Of course, the conversation is never completely bound to basketball. Come for the hoops and stay for the discourse, because we're never quite sure where this discussion will go.
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Now displaying: March, 2016

Broadcasting from the Capital of the Free World, ZardCast is a weekly podcast revolving around the Washington Wizards. Host CT Schwink and a rotating cast of characters break down the week that was in Wizards basketball, dissecting games, hitting on the big stories, as well as unsuccessfully predicting the future. Of course, the conversation is never completely bound to basketball. Come for the hoops and stay for the discourse, because we're never quite sure where this discussion will go. 


Mar 23, 2016
Wizards Winners of 5 Straight, Stuart from Long Island on the Knicks, Duncan Uses Stickum

Today on ZardCast, the guys convene to discuss the Washington Wizards five-game winning streak, including a solid win over the Atlanta Hawks on the road. Later, Stuart from Long Island calls in to complain about the New York Knicks.

Topics discussed include:

  • Things are looking up, Wizards are winners are winners of five straight
  • Duncan projects the Wizards to go 10-2 over their final 12, looking at the Detroit Pistons and Chicago Bulls schedules
  • Vacuum basketball league, the guys would like to have their friend’s baby on the podcast to talk Wizards ASAP
  • Wizards beat the New York Knicks, Markieff Morris shuts down Carmelo Anthony in the second half
  • Morris looking great overall, could be a bigger part of the offense next season
  • Stuart from Plainview calls in to discuss the state of the Knicks, praises Randy Wittman for putting Morris on Melo
  • Kristaps Porzingis is the main attraction for him, thinks Kurt Rambis’ idea for him to play under the basket is preposterous. Stuart says if Phil Jackson coaches home games he’ll renounce his fandom
  • Stuart reviews his partial-season ticket experience at the Verizon Center, says Saturday’s Knicks game was 70% New York fans
  • Washington beats the Atlanta Hawks, best team the Wizards have taken down this side of the All Star break – the big victory over the Pistons was the best win
  • John Wall and Bradley Beal go bananas, Otto Porter has a huge first half
  • Atlanta’s system is weird, kind of like playing a European team
  • CT loves the Wizards more than Fall Out Boy
  • Duncan cops to using Stickum while podcasting, Dave gets upset
  • “This Week in John Wall”
  • Dave drinks 70 margaritas, misses the San Antonio Spurs-Golden State Warriors game
  • Duncan and CT’s brackets are in terrible shape, so is Duncan’s mom
  • The guys predict the Wizards will go 4-1
  • Pop Culture Detour on Batman v. Superman
Mar 18, 2016

Today on ZardCast, the guys are joined by Conor Dirks from Truth About It to discuss the Wizards playoff hopes, Randy Wittman’s lack of awareness and the most #SoWizards moment of the season. Plus, a collapse out west, smashing the Bulls and Pistons at home, Wall’s back-to-back triple doubles and Seamus the leprechaun.

Topics discussed include:

  • CT and Dave hold down the pod tonight
  • Getting into the second half collapse against the Philadelphia
  • The guys discuss the Wizards as a frog in a gradually heating pot, CT is confused as to why the frog wouldn’t hop out
  • Wizards look hopeless against Utah and Denver, super demoralizing
  • Conor Dirks from joins the pod, tying his Pixel and Roll appearances
  • The Wizards technically won, but the guys don’t feel good
  • Conor has an issue with playoff percentages that get published every day, but doesn’t think they’ll be in anyway
  • Randy Wittman vs. Ernie Grunfeld – who is more terrible?
  • It’s gotta be Wittman. He recently blamed the players for not telling him they were getting torched by the pick and roll
  • It’s insane how much of a dick Wittman is to Marcin Gortat
  • The Wizards are most likely going to give Bradley Beal the max, a lot of people thought John Wall wasn’t worth it before the Wizards gave him a new contract. Washington should wait, either, otherwise he might spend all next season pissed off
  • Not protecting the first round draft pick in the Markieff Morris trade is Conor’s top #SoWizards moment of the season
  • One of the worst scoring teams in the Utah Jazz put up 114 on the Wizards
  • Fortunately CT and Dave had other things to do over the weekend than watch these awful basketball games
  • The Wizards blow the Nuggets game in the fourth quarter against a bunch of no names not trying to win games
  • The guys had a raucous Saturday night, glad they both woke up and everything was cool
  • “You’re Being a Real Roy Hibbert”
  • D.C. able to mash the Detroit Pistons at home. The Wizards should run the John Wall pick and roll every play for a quarter and just see what happens
  • Always fun to beat the Chicago Bulls. Nene is the matador in the sense that he stabs the bull in the neck, not so much the dancing around, poor defense kind
  • Duncan had to duck down to Puerto Rico to check on his businesses, will return next week
  • The guys call their leprechaun friend Seamus, he highlights the plight of the modern day leprechaun
  • RIP to the Wizards’ seventh seed hopes
  • “This Week in John Wall”
  • Ted Leonsis teams up with Gene Simmons to bring arena league football to D.C.
Mar 11, 2016

Today on ZardCast, the guys convene to discuss the Wizards three-game losing streak, what it means to their playoff hopes, NBA teams as presidential candidates, a spicy episode of “Dave After Dark” that was too hot to air, Pop Culture Detour and much more.

Topics discussed include:

  • CT explains the term “boat racing” to Dave and Duncan
  • Wizards lose three in a row, playoff hopes are slowly unraveling. Can they still make it?
  • Losing to the Chicago Bulls,
  • If the Wizards are the Marco Rubio of the NBA, the Cleveland Cavaliers are Donald Trump, the Toronto Raptors are Ted Cruz and the Golden State Warriors are Hillary Clinton
  • After beating the Cavaliers in Washington, it seemed inevitable that LeBron James would would whack the Wizards in Ohio
  • CT and Duncan watched the Indiana Pacers game at Matchbox, CT awkwardly watches the end of the match over a booth divider. Dave can’t get a bartender to change the channel from UNC-Duke to the Wizards
  • Pelvic whacking
  • Dave is frustrated by the lack information on Bradley Beal’s injuries, and overall with the lack of information from the organization on where these guys stand
  • Breaking down what went wrong down the stretch against the Pacers
  • Perplexing that Marcin Gortat wasn’t in at the end of the game, the pick and roll with he and John Wall is their best play. Plus, Gortat is the second best player on the team. How can he sit in crucial situations?
  • Wizards have a chance at the end, Wall takes a bad shot
  • Dave recorded a spicy episode of “Dave After Dark” after the Portland game, but iTunes and the FCC have since gotten involved. It might not ever see the light of day
  • The Wizards losing in the middle of the night to the Portland Trailblazers was like a bad trip
  • Buck was so mad the refs missed a six second violation on an inbounds pass at the end of the game
  • The guys hate Gerald Henderson. How the hell did Alan Anderson get tossed at all, and in what world does Henderson not get tossed too
  • Gary Neal waived, Marcus Thornton picked up. He’s basically the same player as Neal. Again, due to lack of information, we don’t know what ailed Neal or how severe it was
  • Looking at the Eastern Conference standings
  • Looking ahead to the next three, the guys all agree the Wizards will go 3-0
  • Pop Culture Detour
  • Discussing the new Game of Thrones trailer
  • The guys all like “Better Call Saul,” Dave hates Jimmy’s brother for being allergic to electricity. Does knowing the endgame with Mike and Jimmy make the show any less interesting?
  • Dinosaur Detour
Mar 4, 2016

Today on ZardCast, CT, Dave and Duncan convene to discuss the Wizards four-game winning streak, if Lebron James is scared of Otto Porter, John Wall closing games, Pop Culture Detours, a Dinosaur Detour, how the elite does their laundry, drama between Dave and Duncan over QuizUp, and much more.

Topics discussed include:

  • The guys reminisce on their terrible kickball team
  • The Wizards are on a four-game winning streak, made it to .500
  • Dave’s excited to root hard against the teams in direct competition with Washington
  • Zards take out the 76ers on the road
  • Duncan finally sees the latest Star Wars, just finished watching the previous films with his girlfriend
  • Nice to see the team shore things up defensively, they’re normally going to be able to score enough points to win
  • Adding Alan Anderson and Markieff Morris has been a helpful development
  • Is Lebron James scared of Otto Porter? That’s most likely why he didn’t play on Sunday
  • The guys are enjoying all of the Cavaliers bullshit being stirred up
  • While the recording the podcast, PTI gives a Not So Happy Anniversary to Otto Porter’s brain-neutral defensive lap against the Bulls last year
  • Bradley Beal wears his mask again against the Timberwolves
  • Another Pop Culture Detour with Dave discussing “Hail Caesar”
  • Shout out to @PreacherBBall and @AndrewKim_47 for helping us out in defining irony
  • Wizards are able to dominate Cleveland, even with Kevin Love and Kyrie Irving
  • Lebron is subtweeting and driving America crazy
  • Dinosaur Detour as Dave tells the guys velociraptors were actually the size of chickens
  • Why do Boston fans always weave their teams into every conversation?
  • Infuriating game against Philadelphia on Monday night until John Wall took over
  • CT gets his dry cleaning picked up and dropped off, Dave and Duncan grill him on it and accuse him of stealing someone’s clothes
  • Dave and Duncan want to unionize against CT
  • Wall starting to drag his team over the finish line more often
  • Morris makes his first start, Marcin Gortat has a career night rebounding
  • Wizards able to take care of the Timberwolves behind a big game from Beal, Alan Anderson scores 18 as well
  • Why has Garrett Temple been starting over Beal when they’ve been playing similar minutes?
  • Porter and Gortat don’t see the floor in the fourth quarter against Minnesota. That’s the magic of Randy Wittman
  • Looking at the Eastern Conference standings
  • Is anyone worried about facing the Raptors should the Wizards grab the seven seed?
  • “This Week in John Wall”

Looking at the next three games, at Cleveland, home against Indiana, at Portland

Dave and Duncan’s QuizUp drama